I’m not entirely sure about sharing this. As I’m typing this on my iPad, it’s starting to hit me that I might lose a few readers. But…and I’m just thinking out loud here…it is my blog. And it is about ME. And, for some reason, I want to share this side of me.
And what is that side you ask? I started this blog to share my obsession with the fabric nylon. Of course, Parachute Pants play a huge part in that. And…again, if you don’t know what parachute pants are/were, go read the Wikipedia entry. Whoever wrote that entry sure did know what he was talking about! Yessireee. It almost could’ve been written by me! (Of course, it was written by me.)
I’ve also revealed my love of lingerie. Underdressing. Wearing nylon/silk/satin pretty lingerie makes me feel awesome. Especially pantyhose, which I wear every darn day. They feel so great. And, if you like wearing pantyhose or any nylon clothing, I highly suggest shaving your body. I’m lucky. I’ve never had much body hair. In gym class, I got teased more than once. Even as an adult, when I had to get dressed in front of some guy friends, one guy said “Dude, you have, like, no leg hair.” Fucking moron. But, that did take me back to how I felt when I was in high school and picked on. This guy was my “friend”, and he wasn’t really trying to humiliate me, but there were other guys I didn’t know too well there too, and I was embarrassed. Anyway…
I shave my legs, arms, and…of course..my face every other day. (I hate this trend of facial hair on every single man in the country!)
All right, I’m a bit of a sissy boy, and I may even be trans. I’m not sure. And I’ve stopped trying to label myself. What gender am I? Well, I know what’s between my legs. But I also know how I feel. It’s the same way I’ve felt as long as I can remember. Saying I was really a girl my whole life really makes things make sense. A lot. I mean, it totally makes my life make sense and fills in a lot of puzzle pieces.
Now, instead of wasting time researching words, like cis-gender, transgender, gender fluid, etc. etc. etc., I really don’t care about words. I am concentrating instead on how I feel. Like, I’ll wear men’s shorts, with pantyhose, and feel totally amazing when I’m out. You know the kind of person who says mean things to me? NO ONE. That’s right. In all my dressing forays in public, not one person has said a word to me about my dress. No one cares. Well…yesterday I was in line at WALGREENS. My outfit was pantyhose, a short black skirt, a sleeveless t-shirt, a camisole underneath. I wore Stan Smith shoes with peds. Yup, the socks with the ball in back. And, I wore a pink baseball hat. I had makeup on. Not one person in line cared, except for a cop. He was staring. Actually, for all I know, he could’ve been attracted to me. But ultimately, he didn’t say anything.
As time goes on, I’ll get more and more adventurous in blurring the gender line. And, I do hope that I get some comments. Compliments. From cute boys. Heck, I’d even be willing to have boys try to ask me out. Those comments would be great! But I’m not too optimistic. Maybe. But as I said, I’ll get more and more confident to go out with as many “girl” items of clothing I can.